Your Old Crap Website | 90s Web Design

Dredging the internet archives 1996-2001 – Websites then and now

Stringfellows

Posted by monkeon on March 25, 2010

First of all, take a look at the warning banner for it is a thing of beauty…

I’m both sad and surprised that the banner to download Microsoft Internet Explorer didn’t say “Internet Sexplorer” to make them a matching pair. “Pair! Fnar fnar.”

By “Politically Incorrect”, he just means mildly sexist – as, to be fair, there doesn’t seem to be any racism or homophobia within.  He’s not actually very good at being un-PC at all.

Likewise, his employment policy actually does seem rather PC, as there are strippers from all over the world working there, and, who knows, perhaps even a couple of transsexuals (I couldn’t tell).

This animation is quite well done. Whatever he is pointing at, it is breast height.

It might be the colours…
but the design of the site rather reminds me of the sort of hyperactive mess that M.I.A. uses for her work…

See what I mean? I wonder what sort of mad man designs something like that?

Oh.

Finally, let’s delve into the “Meet the Angels” section of the website.  But first, heed Peter’s warning…

You know the film “The Ring”?

Each of the “angels” on his site has a personal profile.  Some highlights (best read in the voice of Graham from Blind Date) are as follows:

1. Her interests include the bizarre combination of horse-riding and science fiction. Anyone for a STAR TREK? (Geddit?!)

2. Sporty Marie, our babe from Down Under (meaning Australia, and not her preferred…) is a cricket and rugby fanatic. And thats how she likes her men. Batty and with balls.

3. Ria is just 18. She’s from London. Apart from a fascination with flying, she likes being spoilt rotten. And down at the club, she certainly does. (Get spoilt rotten.)

4. Star is one of our bigger girls. Of course we’re talking personality, because that’s all that matters, right?

5. Angel is 19 years of age and quite literally bosom buddies with Star. (Check out the pics from our launch party if you want to see what I mean). Angel reckons herself to be a fine actress, and is headed for the movies. We all find her quite moving, but in a very different way.

*Vomits into a top hat*

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