Your Old Crap Website | 90s Web Design

Dredging the internet archives 1996-2001 – Websites then and now

Archive for August, 2010

Iceland

Posted by monkeon on August 24, 2010

The meta tags for Iceland in 2000 were rather odd:

“artificial additives, artificial colours, artificial flavours, GM” – that sounds a bit too honest. I wonder if these non-green claims exactly cancel out their green claims, meaning that they are neither good nor bad for the environment.

Then, “Legendary Customer Service” – really?

Now for a quick spot the difference competition –

The top image is the site between Jan and May 2000, and the bottom one thereafter. Although the text has changed, the links are more or less the same apart from one – “Off your trolley”, which didn’t last long for some reason.

Now, Asda used to have a trolley based game which looked as if it would have been great fun –

Could Iceland have made a trolley-based game which is even better?

Sadly, like Store Wars, the game itself was not cached, which is a shame when it promised graphics like this…

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Swatch

Posted by monkeon on August 10, 2010

In 1997, Swatch must have had quite a poor brainstorming session because somehow the idea of a flashing gnome was chosen to welcome website visitors.

Except they didn’t call them gnomes. They called them “dwarves”, leading to some seemingly rather unusual comments about people with dwarfism such as:

The website also had an artist in residence, which at the time was Nam June Paik. He’d designed a watch which he called “Internet Love”. I’ll think of a sarcastic response to his waffle just as soon as I can translate it into sense.

Crikey, I wouldn’t want to go to the toilet at that speed.

Swatch were also dabbling in movie cash-ins, with a section of the site dedicated to the film The Fifth Element. The film was acclaimed for its visuals (and criticised for its weak everything else). Not to be outdone by the spectacle of the film, Swatch had made some state of the art animated gifs for the occasion…

They should show those at the IMAX.

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Chester Zoo

Posted by monkeon on August 2, 2010

The 2001 Chester Zoo website was unusual in that it had next to no interesting animals pictured on it.

I guess these snails might look like giant snails under a microscope

and this could probably pass as a giraffe if you squinted…

I suspect what might have happened was some confusion when the web designer was asked to incorporate a picture of two jaguars onto the homepage.

The guestbook of the site is particularly fine, with people from all over the world queuing up to spout nonsense…

Some other guestbook highlights:

"I like our zoo website. My best animals are orangeutangs. I am learing from my English text book. I like school sometimes and I like popcorn much. I am blonde and I am 11. My mum is 31 and my dad ist 34. They much enjoy things together. My grandma is dead and has bin for much times. I wish I will be ever looking at our zoo for real."

"What is John Prescott doing on our home page? Zoos should not be about politics. God help us if they are."

"One of the keepers, Andrew Lenihan , is a dead ringer for Freddy Mercury"

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